Details, Details

Sorry to leave you with burning questions, but it was Wordless Wednesday, so I couldn't go putting words up you know.

I'm putting my due date around November 20th, which means I'm 6 weeks right now. My cycle was a little off, so I'm making an educated guess here.

Sorry to disappoint, but we're probably not going to find out the sex.

I'm about 99% certain that the baby, should it be a girl, will not be named Myrtle. (Although it is a lovely name indeed.) That goes up to 100% if it's a boy.

Chris left it up to me whether or not to tell everyone this early. When I really thought about it, I realized that keeping it a secret would only be out of fear of losing the baby. For me, having the attitude of "I'd better not get excited because it may be taken away again" is a very ungrateful attitude to have. For someone who's prayed and hoped and remained faithful month after month after month, it's impossible to not rejoice and praise God for this gift. And it is a gift, no matter how long I have it. Whether it be another week or half a century, I'm blessed.

So, pray hard for this little one! And for me, because I'm understandably a little more anxious than the last two times. I'm finding that it's really hard to only think positive thoughts when you've had a miscarriage.

The hardest part of making the announcement is knowing so many others that have been trying for so long and have experienced their own losses. There's a little guilt that comes with sharing my joy when I know how hard it is to hear that yet another friend is pregnant. For those that haven't been there, it's really hard. You so want to be happy for your friend (and you are), but it's just heartbreaking that it's not you. Again. And it just plain sucks. I'm tearing up as I write this even. I just wanted you all to know that I'm praying that God blesses you with encouragement and peace as you deal with the pain that comes with infertility and miscarriage.